Very recently, a much-admired colleague broke down in tears after I paid her a compliment. I was surprised! I look up to Yves (not real name) in many ways. This lady had spunk, style, knew her stuff and carried herself with reasonable confidence. You can then imagine my surprise!
She shared with me (I am grateful for such an honour) how she was at a low point in her life. Being me, I probed a bit further, and it happened that she was putting herself through the wringers for not moving as fast on a personal goal as she wanted to. She felt undeserving of what she had accomplished so far. This resonated with my journey.
I’m constantly amazed by the number of talented, graceful and game-changing women who put themselves and their work down. Many times not because others have but more because of their overexerted self-criticism. It is called the impostor syndrome.
It has no bias for demography and can affect just about anyone – mostly women. Impostor syndrome usually shows up after an accomplishment – graduation from college, a promotion at work, weight loss or gain, etc.
Three ways to overcome self-doubt
- Remember – You are not alone
The one you look up to feels self-doubt occasionally or even more frequently. Very successful women are known to battle with feelings of insecurity or inadequacy. You feel like a fraud; you are not convinced that you have what it takes to become more. Well, some of the world’s most successful women have felt the same or worse so, chin up, you’re in good company!
- Use words of affirmation
I am Fearless, and I am Enough!To rid yourself of the nagging feeling of inadequacy – which is fear masked as whatever – affirm and re-affirm yourself daily. This ritual boosts your confidence and gives you positive energy that takes you through the day. The practice is also rooted both in Science and Spirituality, which is a rarity. Therefore, I practice this religiously and have experienced tremendous personal growth. Say this to yourself every day:
- Celebrate milestones
Don’t wait for the significant, earth-shaking events before you celebrate yourself and all the work you’ve put in. I’ve learnt to mark every single progress. Similarly, reward yourself for crossing every T and moving the needle on your goals. This way, you can look back and see how far you’ve come on your journey.
So, m’lady, you are terrific, full of light, an inspiration to many. You deserve every success and progress that comes your way because you have worked hard for it. Take a minute to celebrate yourself today.
You are an answer to many prayers. Your business has put food on tables, and your words have healed hearts.
Your coaching will create leaders, many of whom you’ll never have a clue to their existence. Folks will intentionally look out for your exceptional content and draw inspiration from your life’s work. Stop hiding your gift!
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